CHAPTER 5
Against those who on account of sickness go away home
"I am sick here," said one of the pupils, "and I wish to return
home." At home, I suppose, you free from sickness. Do you not consider
whether you are doing, anything here which may be useful to the
exercise of your will, that it may be corrected? For if you are
doing nothing toward this end, it was to no purpose that you came.
Go away. Look after your affairs at home. For if your ruling power
cannot be maintained in a state conformable to nature, it is
possible that your land can, that you will he able to increase your
money, you will take care of your father in his old age, frequent
the public place, hold magisterial office: being bad you will do badly
anything else that you have to do. But if you understand yourself, and
know that you are casting away certain bad opinions and adopting
others in their place, and if you have changed your state of life from
things which are not within your will to things which are within
your will, and if you ever say, "Alas!" you are not saying what you
say on account of your father, or your brother, but on account of
yourself, do you still allege your sickness? Do you not know that both
disease and death must surprise us while we are doing something? the
husbandman while he is tilling the ground, the sailor while he is on
his voyage? what would you be doing when death surprises you, for
you must be surprised when you are doing something? If you can be
doing anything better than this when you are surprised, do it. For I
wish to be surprised by disease or death when I am looking after
nothing else than my that may be free from perturbation, own will that
I may be free from hindrance, free from compulsion, and in a state
of liberty. I wish to be found practicing these things that I may be
able to say to God, "Have I in any respect transgressed thy
commands? have I in any respect wrongly used the powers which Thou
gavest me? have I misused my perceptions or my preconceptions? have
I ever blamed Thee? have I ever found fault with Thy administration? I
have been sick, because it was Thy will, and so have others, but I was
content to be sick. I have been poor because it was Thy will, but I
was content also. I have not filled a magisterial office, because it
was not Thy pleasure that I should: I have never desired it. Hast Thou
ever seen me for this reason discontented? have I not always
approached Thee with a cheerful countenance, ready to do Thy
commands and to obey Thy signals? Is it now Thy will that I should
depart from the assemblage of men? I depart. I give Thee all thanks
that Thou hast allowed me to join in this Thy assemblage of men and to
see Thy works, and to comprehend this Thy administration." May death
surprise me while I am thinking of these things, while I am thus
writing and reading.
"But my mother will not hold my head when I am sick." Go to your
mother then; for you are a fit person to have your head held when
you are sick. "But at home I used to lie down on a delicious bed."
Go away to your bed: indeed you are fit to lie on such a bed even when
you are in health: do not, then, lose what you can do there.
But what does Socrates say? "As one man," he says, "is pleased
with improving his land, another with improving his horse, so I am
daily pleased in observing that I am growing better." "Better in what?
in using nice little words?" Man, do not say that. "In little
matters of speculation?" What are you saying? "And indeed I do not see
what else there is on which philosophers employ their time." Does it
seem nothing to you to have never found fault with any person, neither
with God nor man? to have blamed nobody? to carry the same face always
in going out and coming in? This is what Socrates knew, and yet he
never said that he knew anything or taught anything. But if any man
asked for nice little words or little speculations, he would carry him
to Protagoras or to Hippias; and if any man came to ask for pot-herbs,
he would carry him to the gardener. Who then among you has this
purpose? for if indeed you had it, you would both be content in
sickness, and in hunger, and in death. If any among you has been in
love with a charming girl, he knows that I say what is true.
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